4.11.23

Section 25 of GLARE by A.R. Ammons

it scares me to think that being 
just me won’t be enough to do it:

(I’ve had a problem feeling like it 
up to now) but it scares me

more to think I have to be more than 
I am because like I said I’m already

running a deficit: and it scares me 
even more to think I could get by

with less than just me: because if 
I’ve amounted to nothing up to now

wouldn’t I amount to less being 
less: well, but then you have to

think, how well does this thing that 
has to be done have to be done:

maybe nobody can do it as well as I 
think it should be done: if it’s

okay to do it well enough to get 
by, why then maybe I’m your man after

all because I’m OVERSIZE Average, 
and even the low range of my average

should do to do it: there you are: 
the thing is to do it, go ahead and

do it: and see what happens: people 
may appreciate it more than you

think: often people expect so little: 
there are so many things they’re

used to finding they can’t do any 
better than anyone else: and if

you’re really good, they can be 
resentful and jealous (and you, by

the way, can be removed from regular 
average into an object of some awe

and fear, and people will fear you 
then but they won’t like you): if

you do poorly but show 
resolve and courage, you may attract

a lot of mutual understanding and 
sympathy and from a few possibly a

few offers of help: what we have 
here, in other words, is some pretty

down to earth stuff in which a lot 
of shining on your part may not be

all that appropriate: when #1 looks 
up, there is no one to look up to, and

when he looks down, he has no equal 
and no friend: he attracts,

quite contrariwise, sleazers, weaslers, 
pleasers and outrageously impertinent

nobodies who think they should be #1 and 
have not once imagined the bad

side of that, be average (or a little less) 
the wide world of the average is the

widest world to inherit, whereas 
splendor lives by itself in a place

of icy mirrors and chilling rooms